Kettlercise - Day 63
Kettlercise is the next “something-cise” fitness classes on my agenda, with Mike Charlwood from Priority One Fitness. You may remember Mike from the Insanity challenge, as I fondly referred to him as “Tigger on Smarties.” This time, I think he’ll be less bouncy, on account of the fact we’ll be swinging clumps of metal about. There are various weights to choose from but I immediately bonded with the runt of the litter - the little 4kg kettle.
Mike explained that we’ll be working through sets of exercises to a tempo and we must concentrate on our technique where possible. I said I was a little concerned about my lower back but he explained that if my posture was correct, I would be fine. This included ensuring the shoulders were back, with knees slightly bent, looking up and to clench the buttocks. To help with this, he told us to imagine that we were clenching a £20 note between our cheeks. £20? After the indulgences of the past few months, I could probably clench a whole ATM machine.
We grabbed a mat and found a space; to my horror, the back was already taken, which meant I was in prime eye-line position. Not good. I placed my kettlebell next to me as the music started and we commenced the warm-up, with me under Mike’s watchful eye. The warm-up was very straightforward but then came the start of the workout and the relationship with my new metal friend. Kettlebell was so informal that I vowed to think up a new name for it by the end of the session.
Kettlercise is essentially a fat burning class, where the kettlebell exercises are designed to strengthen and tone. Mike is Mr Kettlercise and as an instructor, I know he is a massive fan, so I was happy to place my trust in him and follow his instructions, even though I was starting to wince. As the class went on, we tackled different areas and awoke different muscles, I was starting to find it really challenging but because the exercises moved on so quickly, it was manageable. Although the kettlebell felt like it doubled in weight every 10 minutes, and it was starting to test our relationship.
I was pleased I was following fairly well and hadn’t managed to bang myself with my weight, even when it had to be swung around our head. As I gritted my teeth for a 30-second countdown, I distracted myself by renaming my kettlebell, Bella. I transported my mind to me and Bella on a beach, working out. Mike interrupted my day dream by adjusting my stance, as I don’t seem to understand that shoulder width apart and hip width apart are different.
Next to the floor, as we momentarily collapsed on our mats before Mike showed us the next drill. We had to lie down flat and lift the kettlebell above our heads and back and repeat. I slowly lifted Bella behind my head to the count of three and lowered her to the count of three then for some reason dropped her on the floor and lifted my head up, not realising that I had dumped a 4kg weight on my ponytail. As I came up, I was yanked back down like an elastic band. This would be bad enough on its own and I checked to see if anybody had noticed but on the next one, I did the same thing again. How?
It was there that my relationship with Bella ended. I resentfully renamed it “Kev” the kettlebell - apologies to all Kev’s out there - but Bella was too pretty a name for it now. I wonder if anybody else was having the same kind of internal discussions as I seemed to be having with this inanimate object. Possibly not...
Big kettlebell and little kettlebell/baby bell...
Anyway, apart from the fact I probably won’t be able to move the next day, as I feel the grey cloud of aches already descending upon me, I enjoyed the class and it makes the shortlist for classes enjoyed and to do post challenge. I have decided that as long as it doesn’t have a burpee in it, I will be taking up some kind of fitness class after the challenge...but not with Kev - Bella maybe but not Kev!
Sofa Dodger; One Woman's Quest to Try 100 Different Sports and Fitness Classes in a Year is available on Amazon, please click here
